It's no secret the FNC are huge Maggie Stiefvater fans. But when Frankie and I sat down to co-review FOREVER, we realized we just...couldn't. Not coherently, anyway. And who wants to read a post filled with "OMG I LOVED IT! OMG WITH THE WOLVES! OMG THE KISSING! AND OMG THE WOLVES! AND OMG THAT OTHER PART WE CAN'T TALK ABOUT! (because our reviews are spoiler free!)" AND OMG I LOVED IT! AND THE KISSING OMG! AND THAT ENDING! O.M.G."
So, we decided to call in some back-up.
|Jacob Black! Edward Cullen!|
Frankie and Sara: Take it away, boys!
Jacob: First of all, Grace is a werewolf in this book. And she's cool about it, unlike some other she-wolves I know. Which makes her AWESOME.
Edward: Perhaps we should start by discussing the literary merits of Stiefvater's lyrical style. I have seven PhDs in English. I know these things.
Jacob: You have seven PhDs in STUPID. I don't care about style. I care that I liked this story! Also, werewolves are awesome. And I loved seeing Grace's character as a girl. And a wolf. It upped the tension between her and Sam so much.
Edward: Did you know that Cole was a perfect foil for Sam, and that Stiefvater used such literary techniques as simile and metaphor to draw out the emotional core of all four narrators?
Jacob: Can you shut up with this literary mumbo-jumbo and just talk about what you liked? This is a review, not a thesis!
Edward: Fine. I liked the romance and deep love between Grace and Sam. Sam is a gentlemen. Unlike that rake, Cole St. Clair, who needs to learn propriety. And wear clothes more often.
Jacob: Wolves don't need clothes!
Edward: I will choose to ignore that last comment. Moving forward. I found myself so enthralled with the narrative that I was vexed to come to its conclusion.
Jacob: It was so intense! It was BAM! And then SLAM! And POW! And BANG!
Edward: Listen, dog. No one will take this review seriously if you use terms like that!
Edward: This book had great agency. I found myself turning pages at an alarmingly-fast rate. My only critique of Ms. Stiefvater is the glaring absence of vampires in her novel. It was a good novel, but with vampires...it could have been great.
Jacob: WTF?! This novel is AWESOME, and vampires suck, dude.
Edward: How dare you! I can sparkle!
Jacob: But can you do...THIS!?
Edward: I don't feel the need to prove my skills with you, Jacob. In conclusion, I found the novel to be one of emotional intensity and lyrical beauty. It was a breathtaking race to the climax that I didn't want to see end.
Jacob: Okay, man. I guess we can agree on this one thing. FOREVER rocked!
Edward: You...you agree with me?
Jacob: Ohh yeah...
You guys stole my copy of Forever!
Frankie and Sara: Ok guys, that's a wrap. FOREVER comes out July 12th! Find it wherever books are sold! And buy it! Or maybe win an ARC from us! (Or Edward might try to kiss YOU, too.)